A Holiday Event Involving Ludwig van Beethoven

[Right: Castle5000 in

its holiday splendor]

The L&TM5K invites you to join in an annual holiday tradition -- the Countdown to Beethoven's Birthday! That's right, in the nine days leading up to birthday of the great musical prophet of romanticism and individualism, we'll be listening to his nine symphonies in order. We'll be celebrating art, music, freedom, passion, innovation, tradition, and the really cool noises that can be made by several dozen professional musicians all jamming out simultaneously.

C'mon! It'll be fun! And it all starts on Saturday.

FREQUENTLY VOICED OBJECTIONS

Q: But I have no interest in classical music.
A: Well, that's fair. But maybe you could cultivate an interest? You're an educated person, you're clearly capable of appreciating things that require some attention and patience. It's not like you are going to be lying there on your deathbed thinking, "man, I sure wish I hadn't ever given classical music a chance."

Q: Beethoven is just another dead white European male representative of an exploitative, oppressive cultural hegemony. We should throw off our chains!
A: Indisputably. On the other hand, there's a reason some of this stuff still attracts attention 200 years later. It's incredibly well crafted. It's got a lot of emotional power for a lot of people. It sounds really cool. Might just rock your world.

Q: I don't have time for this sort of thing.
A: And yet you read blogs?

Q: This is stupid.
A: Arguably.

Q: Why symphonies?
A: Well, we're way too late to count down the 32 piano sonatas. Some years I do the five piano concerti. But this year I'm in a symphony mood.

Q: I don't happen to have copies of the Beethoven symphonies on hand.
A: A common problem! Fortunately, our modern age offers many solutions. Unfortunately, an easy-to-find and legal place to download or stream the symphonies for free does not appear to be one of them. I tried.

• Most readers live in cities with many RECORD STORES. There are many discount classical labels, and you usually get two symphonies on a CD, so this would not be at all exorbitant. I particularly recommend the NAXOS label, on which you could probably get all of the symphonies for around $25.
  
• Your local LIBRARY will let you borrow 'em for free.
  
• I'm sure ITUNES could hook you up. Or,
  
• You could do like michael5000 and join EMUSIC. In fact, you could take advantage of the Emusic "50 free downloads" trial offer, download the 37 movements of the nine symphonies, and have enough tracks left over to snag an old Mountain Goats album. (In fact you could do this, tell them michael5000 sent you, and score me 50 free downloads too. But that's not what this is all about.)
  
• You could use devious internet trickses that kind of defy intellectual property laws.

However you're going to do it, you better get on it. We're starting with Beethoven's First tomorrow!

Q: Do you really think anyone's going to do this?
A: Oh, probably not. Maybe a few people will do a few of the days?